Lump n Bump

On Friday I go to work, I get work done, no big deal. The door to my office is wide open, I’ve got on my business-as-usual persona, which helps me forget that my belly, my back, my neck is uncomfortable. I’m calm, then Theresa from Roswell calls me around 1030am and says that she met with the Enfamil rep. She has good news and launches right into it:

The sales rep that Theresa met with gifted my family six cases of infant formula. My jaw fell open and forgot to inhale. I wanted to ask Theresa to confirm that I heard her right; six cases of formula? Do I even know how long that will last? How great a financial relief that brings my family? Theresa of course didn’t hear these questions, because my brain was still rebooting the talking function. So Theresa continued, grinning, the sales rep also gifted a little insulated formula bag with some coupons and goodies in it. This piece of news matched my expectations, so I was able to stammer out the beginning of a thank you. My jumbled words were cut short because I heard Theresa smiling again on the other end of the line. Wait, wait, there’s more! Enfamil would like to provide formula to my baby girl for as long as she needs it.

At this, I begin hyperventilating. Tears are on my cheeks, I’m standing, and spinning literally and mentally. I can’t be hearing right, or understanding. Theresa is beaming on the other end of the phone, she is so excited to break the news to me, to reassure me that my baby will eat as cost efficiently as George did. The huge expense of formula that I was grappling with at the same time that I was grappling with the emotional loss of not breastfeeding my daughter is gone. This gift takes away a lot of the resentment for my breast cancer diagnosis.

I chide Theresa for not giving me any warning! I’m crying and my office door is wide open, people are going to worry something is wrong! We chuckle and she repeats everything for me. Theresa reiterates that she’s so happy to do this for me because I’m special to her and the Roswell team.

I call Nick and my first words to him, through tears, are that I’m ok, I have very good news. I choke out the news about the formula, and he can’t understand me, so I have to pause and try again. And the third time was the charm. Finally I got the message through and Nick laughed with relief. He told me to catch my breath and get back to work. I sobbed a big wet ok, and he laughed me off the phone.

I reach out to Jenna and left a sobbing voice message asking get to pinch me if this is real. She texts back and says it is.